The Stain of my Existence
Had the pleasure of visiting the lovely state of North Carolina this weekend. On top of that, I was glad to be able to do a show on campus at NC State in Raleigh. Great weekend, no question.
This was a “Whose Rhyme is it Anyway?” weekend where I was traveling with my fellow compatriots in freestyle, Playdough and Heath McNease. www.whoserhymeisitanyway.com
Our friend, Hector, let us crash at his house late Friday night in Fayetteville, NC. Saved us from getting a hotel, plus we got to check out his comic collection and his bookshelf full of action figures. I woke up in the middle of the night and, I can’t be sure….BUT, I could have sworn that I saw Heath making Spider Man have a kung fu death match with Boba Fett, with the prize being a date with Wonder Woman. It seemed too crazy to be true, so I went back to sleep.
Next day, we roll with Hector and a couple of college students to this All-You-Can-Eat Chinese spot called Shogun in Lumberton, NC. Hector is a campus minister at a small college in NC. All you can eat? shoot, you KNOW that I was ready to go.
This place was off the meter in the sheer volume and choices they had. I mean, Hibachi, Sushi, …..tons of things I don’t know what to call…Hibachi, Sushi, you get the picture. So, I’m on plate number 3 (or was it 4?)….not sure because MSG has been known to clog memory banks. Regardless, I go to cut into some sort of pork and i knock over a container of sauce all over my jeans. If you haven’t figured it out yet, your boy is inherently a clumsy moron.
I say something like “Howdy Doody!” Actually I said “AAhhhh Hell!” Of course, my home boys were feeling sorry for me. No, Wait. No they weren’t. Playdough nearly fell out of his chair and kept asking for me to stand up so he could see the stain on my pants. Not to mention, they were giving me a hard time about my PG rated semi-expletive in front of the college kids. I assure them that I wasn’t cursing. I was simply getting ready to preach a little bit about how scary of a place it probably is in the great down below.
Luckily, I had an extra pair of jeans with me, so crisis avoided. Although, I was sort of excited because the sauce stain on the front of those pants came out in the image of Saint Wayne Newton, so I’ve got that going for me. They’ll never be washed again.
<We pose for a Glamour Shot with some students after the NC State Show>
In short, we got to Raleigh that afternoon, did the show and had a great time with with those guys. Went so well, they’re scheduling our trip back to campus for the Spring as we speak. But when I hit the Shogun next time, I’m wearing a full rain suit. Sauce me once, shame on your. Sauce me tw…..never mind.
Life Don’t Rhyme,
Greg “Manchild” Owens
