Back by popular demand (by that, I mean my brother-in-law asked me about the blog), we’re BACK. Let’s get this puppy rolling again.
I hope you guys are well. Things at Casa de Owens are going great. My oldest is now 13, my youngest is 2, and Child Services has still yet to bust my door down, so I assume we’re doing an okay job.
I’ve recently switched jobs, which is showing to be a good transition. Music is where it needs to be. Mars ILL record is coming along. I’m also doing some writing for some Youtube projects you’d never suspect I’m part of.
So….any funny stories from this week? ….
Oh, yesterday I was calling my bank and checking on a couple of transactions, balance (above zero? Woohoo!) and using the voice commands as I was driving. Let’s face it. Texting and driving is illegal in Georgia, and I can’t think of a worse story to tell my cellmates in the Pokey than, “You slapped a cop? OH yeah….me? I was texting in traffic.” Snoop Dogg is all set to release a song all about it.
IRREGAHDLESS, the Banking voice prompts (via speakerphone) were asking me my next move and who should chime in? My Navigation system!…That’s right. The Australian-accented Garmin would tell me to turn right just as the robo-banking voice would ask me for a vital piece of information.
Banking: “Please Confirm the Last Four Digits of Your Social.”
Garmin Chick: “Please Turn right in 50 yards”
Banking Voice: “I’m Sorry, I didn’t get that”
Me: “REPRESENTATIVE!”
Banking Voice: “Did you say…’Transfer Funds’?”
Garmin Broad: “Drive 8.3 miles, then stab yourself with a pencil.”
Me: “OPERATOR!”
Banking Voice: “Could you repeat that?”
And on….and on…..and on.
Thank the Lord, I made it safely to my destination and, to my knowledge, didn’t send all my money to any unsuspecting third party.
Where was my destination? KFC, all day! That Double Down is no joke.
Life Don’t Rhyme,
Greg “Manchild” Owens
